Character in leadership is a given. But how can character be defined and modeled?
Character is displayed in the micro-actions that we perform every day. Character is shown in the tough times, it’s shown in the normal times. People see daily micro-actions and they make their own decisions about whether this person has character or not. Generally, I think we all know what right and wrong look like. Another part of this is that we judge ourselves by our intentions, but we judge others by their actions. We may be thinking we’re appearing one way because of our intentions, but other people might see it a different way. We have to think about what it looks like from the outside and what it looks like if someone were to see me doing this thing. Again, character is exhibited through actions. As I think about appearances and perception, I have to be very intentional about what I’m doing. Finally, I’ve used a simple acronym to help me model character: TDR. What makes a good decision? Transparent, Defendable, and Repeatable. If you can apply TDR to every decision you’re going to make, you’re probably going to be okay.
The perception of character is somewhat subjective, then. What needs to happen to bring leaders and teams to the same perception of character being displayed in the right way?
For us to have the same perception of character, we have to hold it up and look at it, and talk about it. I was doing a workshop and somebody said, “I like to lead by example.” I said, “That’s awesome. I love that.” But here’s the thing. If you’re going to lead by example and you’re doing something in your office with the door closed, they may not see it. When you lead by example, if they can’t see that example, they can’t follow it. You have to make it obvious by making it a topic of a guided conversation. Leaders have to play the ethical midfield when it comes to character, because things on the edges get fuzzy. We have to stay away from the gray areas and be a shining example of what right looks like.
How can character become more of a consistent habit for leaders?
One of the things I talk about in workshops is ground-speed zero. As a military aviator, we’d spend a lot of our pre-flight planning time talking about different options and decision points we might face while flying, because while we’re flying, we’re moving along at 300 miles an hour. However, while we’re sitting on the ground, our ground speed is zero. I have plenty of time to bring my smart brain and not my emotional brain into this decision, and figure out what the right decision is.
Let’s translate that into a moral or an ethical decision. A good example might be, I’ve decided at groundspeed zero that I’m not going to fake anything on my travel expenses. Later, when I’m on the move, I find myself in a situation where I need a receipt for a reimbursable taxi ride. The driver says he’ll leave the amount blank for me to fill in, wink-wink. My response will be, “No, I want you to write in the amount for me.” When I do that, I’m telling that taxi driver, first of all, I’m trying to be a man of integrity, a man of character. Second of all, don’t tempt me; I’m much more successful when I stay away from temptation. These are the kind of decisions we make before we got into that situation. You must prepare yourself for the moral dilemma before you get there.
What displays of poor character erode loyalty?
Hypocrisy, narcissism, self-centeredness, those kinds of things just erode trust, and trust is fundamental to successful teams in the long term. You can have success without trust, but it will be short-lived. You’re going to lose a lot of people. People leave when they don’t trust their team or their boss. As a leader, we must remember that the requirements of character go up as you rise in leadership: the higher up you are, the higher your standard of ethical behavior becomes. That’s evidenced when we see an intern make a bad choice versus a senior leader make the very same bad choice, and they’re treated very differently because one of them ought to know better. Another interesting observation about trust occurs when a person is named to a very high position. They normally bring along a person with whom they have a long-term relationship. Why? Because they’ve got trust with that person. This person may need to learn some things about the new job, but you can’t teach them trust.
How do you recover from falling down regarding character?
Transparency. You’ve got to own it. The fake apology doesn’t really work, and we’ve seen that on social media when people make mistakes and then try to fake it. They never really say, “I’m sorry,” or, “I did something wrong.” They beat around the bush and think that’s good enough, and they just don’t want to admit it. When you deny your bad choice and try to talk your way out of it, nobody but you believes it. People will forgive a mis-step, but when you don’t admit it, it sounds like you were intentional about it, you’re not sorry about it. That’s when people decide to turn you off. Making the right choice, taking the high road, may end up costing you time, money, resources, promotion, whatever. Every day when you get up, the one person you’re going to see is yourself. Are you willing to look at yourself in the mirror and say, “I did this thing?” Additionally, another part of recovery is empowering people around you to keep an eye on you. Ideally, you do that beforehand.
How is the perception of character changing with the generational shift now happening?
Today’s work environment is different than it used to be. Twentieth century leaders came down out of the ivory tower and looked down on the little people to make sure they were doing the things they were supposed to do—then they went back in the ivory tower. Twenty-first century leaders come out of the ivory tower and dive right in. They dig in the trench and sit on the assembly line and make phone calls and answer calls and work the front desk at the hotel or at the airline counter. They do all those things because that’s what’s expected of today’s leader. The expectations are different, and higher. There’s more transparency with social media. Everything is public. You can’t really hide anything anymore. You just have to be more intentional. The things that are important to millennials are becoming important in the workforce because they have more choices than ever on where they want to work. Additionally, they’re making the big decisions and leading organizations. Work has changed.
How can consistent displays of strong character benefit organizations?
Consistency is very important. Your team needs to know, with a high degree of certainty, what your decisions will generally look like. That enables them to make independent decisions that are in line with the leader’s decisions. It speeds things up. Consistent moral character will also drive loyalty and trigger higher employee engagement levels. Conversely, inconsistent moral character will erode trust and slow things down. I was talking with a guy about a certain leader and he said, “You know, some leaders I’d follow to the gates of hell with two five-gallon cans of gasoline. This guy we’re talking about, I wouldn’t follow him to the movie theater.” Everyone has to make their own choice which of those leaders they want to be.